Nobel Lie? Sin, Choice, and Responsibility in a Broken World

 

From the Garden of Eden to the complexities of modern society, humanity has wrestled with deception dressed as virtue. In Genesis, Satan approached Eve with a noble-sounding promise: freedom, wisdom, and the chance to be like God. Yet behind the alluring words lay destruction (Genesis 3:5). This “nobel lie” doesn’t shout or coerce—it whispers, appealing to our desire to be independent, to act as our own gods. Eve acted, and Adam failed to speak truth, allowing deception to take root. The lesson is clear: deception thrives not only on individual weakness but also on the avoidance of personal responsibility.

As I prepare for the upcoming year working with children who have experienced extraordinary circumstances, these truths take on urgent meaning. These children naturally ask questions we sometimes struggle to answer ourselves: Why is there sin in the world? Why does a good and loving God allow this? How can God create all things and yet allow such suffering? The reality of sin touches every life—young and old, famous and unseen (Romans 3:20)—and confronting these questions honestly is essential.

Here, honesty matters. Sin is universal. Original sin may be uncomfortable to accept, but it levels us all before God. None of us can escape the reality of moral failure through achievement, wealth, or cleverness. Yet human nature continually seeks to justify itself—blaming circumstances, systems, or other people for choices we make. This avoidance of personal responsibility is exactly what the nobel lie exploits.

Paradoxically, the presence of sin allows moral choice to exist. Without the possibility of wrong, we could not truly choose right. Sin presents the contrast between obedience and rebellion, action aligned with God’s truth or turning away. But the nobel lie tempts us to escape responsibility entirely: to blame society, culture, or ideology for moral failures. We may even sink into despair, overwhelmed by the weight of our weakness, or rationalize our behavior with clever self-justifications. Scripture, however, calls us neither to despair nor to excuse ourselves; it calls us to see sin honestly, to confront our failures, and to take responsibility.

In modern society, this dynamic often manifests in narratives of victimization. Calls for justice and equality are real and necessary, but the nobel lie can distort them. When attention focuses on one group’s grievances, the scales may tip, leaving other perspectives unseen or dismissed. In attempting to correct injustices, society sometimes risks replacing accountability with selective outrage or moral favoritism. The danger is subtle: virtue can appear to be achieved while pride, envy, or self-interest quietly manipulate the process.

The first human story illustrates this pattern. Eve, tempted by the nobel lie, acted independently, believing the promise of wisdom and autonomy. Adam stood silently, failing to uphold God’s command. Deception flourished through both individual weakness and mutual failure. Today, moral truth is similarly compromised when individuals or societies fail to acknowledge responsibility, while elevating partial narratives over universal accountability.

• C.S. Lewis recognized the dangers of freedom without accountability. In his reflections on democracy, he wrote that unchecked power must be balanced to prevent corruption. Similarly, sin and personal irresponsibility left unchecked can distort justice and destroy community.

• Throughout my education, I studied thinkers like Freud, Nietzsche, and Maslow, each of whom wrestled with human behavior and morality. Freud emphasized unconscious drives; Nietzsche critiqued morality and the illusions of human ideals; Maslow explored human motivation and self-actualization. Each provides insight into the human struggle, but none account for the Creator or the ultimate source of truth. Their frameworks often mirror the nobel lie: suggesting that humans can define good and evil apart from God, or escape the consequences of sin through intellect or philosophy.

These truths are more than abstract ideas—they guide how we equip children to navigate life:

• Helping them recognize that wrong actions are part of life, not a personal failing.

• Providing tools to make wise choices despite difficult circumstances.

• Teaching accountability, empathy, and resilience as antidotes to the effects of sin.

• Showing that while sin exists, God’s love, guidance, and justice are constant.

The nobel lie exposes the human tendency to avoid responsibility, pursue self-interest, and embrace deceptive appearances of virtue. Scripture, by contrast, offers clarity: God never deceives, and His commands guide us toward life and justice. Recognizing sin equips us to embrace moral responsibility, navigate societal tensions wisely, and act with integrity. Choice is real, consequences are real, and accountability—both to God and to one another—is essential for true justice.

Modern society struggles to balance justice, responsibility, and equality. Calls to elevate one group may unintentionally tip the scales, while the nobel lie encourages self-justification or despair. For children who have experienced trauma, understanding these truths can be transformative: they learn to confront sin honestly, take responsibility, and navigate life with courage, discernment, and resilience. By acknowledging our shared condition, facing our personal failures, and grounding our choices in God’s truth, we gain humility, freedom, and the ability to pursue justice that is both fair and enduring.

Breaking the Victim Narrative: Choosing Freedom in Life’s Storms

 

Life’s storms—whether a teen navigating senior year or an adult facing a major life transition—can easily encourage a victim mentality. We may find ourselves saying:

• “This is too hard; I can’t handle it.”
• “It’s not my fault; life just happened to me.”
• “I’ll never be able to change; I’m stuck this way.”
• “I’ve done it this way for the past thirty years; it will take the next thirty years to change.”

While circumstances may be challenging, Scripture calls us to take responsibility for our choices and the focus of our hearts, even in difficult seasons.

Adopting a victim mentality can feel comforting in the short term. It can justify avoidance, indulgence, or retreat into instant pleasure—gaming, gambling, substances, or social distractions. These thoughts, especially the belief that “I’ve always done it this way,” can prevent us from taking small, daily steps toward lasting change.

“We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.” (2 Corinthians 10:5, ESV)

The first step to freedom is recognizing that our thoughts, reactions, and heart focus matter, and that God has equipped us with the Spirit and gifts to act differently than our impulses or circumstances might suggest.

Our choices begin in the heart.

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.” (Proverbs 4:23, ESV)

When our heart focuses on self-pity, comparison, or instant gratification, our actions follow—often leading to shame, secrecy, and cycles of addiction. But when our hearts focus on God, gratitude, and responsibility, we align with His design for self-control, wisdom, and stability.

Teens and adults alike must learn to distinguish legitimate struggles from excuses that empower false solutions:

• For teens: Peer pressure, school challenges, and uncertainty about the future can feel overwhelming. Choosing responsibility means facing challenges, seeking godly guidance, and avoiding instant gratification.
• For adults: Retirement, career changes, or family transitions may evoke anxiety or a sense of loss. Choosing responsibility means seeking purpose, remaining disciplined, and trusting God through the unknown.

“I can do all things through him who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13, ESV)

Even when circumstances feel impossible, God equips us to respond with wisdom and self-control.

 

Breaking Free from Excuses

1. Acknowledge reality – name the challenge without assigning sole blame to circumstances or others.
2. Take ownership of choices – recognize that your responses, even to difficult situations, are within your control.
3. Shift heart focus to God – cultivate gratitude, prayer, and reliance on Scripture to redirect impulses.
4. Engage in godly habits – routines, accountability, and service strengthen the heart against temptation.
5. Accept growth as a process – setbacks may happen, but freedom comes from persistence, not perfection.

Breaking the victim narrative is not about denying challenges or pretending life is easy. It’s about choosing freedom in Christ, taking responsibility for our thoughts and actions, and refusing to let circumstances dictate our destiny.

David Powlison, in many of his writings, helped me see that change rarely happens in isolation. Addiction grows in secrecy and shame, but healing grows in the light of community.

We need people who will speak truth when we want to believe lies. We need friends who will pray when we feel too weak to lift our heads. We need the church to be the kind of place where struggles are not hidden but carried together.

Powlison reminded me that the gospel is not only about me and Jesus—it’s about us and Jesus.

“God sets the lonely in families.” (Psalm 68:6, ESV)

He gives us brothers and sisters so we never walk alone.

Sometimes this is messy. Loving an addict means bearing burdens, facing disappointments, and setting wise boundaries. But it is worth it. Every time we come alongside someone, we act as the hands and feet of Christ.

Life’s storms will come. For teens, the pressures of school, peers, and an uncertain future. For adults, transitions, career changes, and new seasons of life. The temptation to retreat into instant relief, indulgence, or avoidance is real.

But when we choose responsibility, take ownership of our thoughts and actions, and rely on God’s Spirit and the community He provides, we discover something beautiful: strength, resilience, and lasting stability.

Change is possible. Growth is real. Freedom is found in Christ.

Navigating Life’s Storms: Seasons of Change

 

One of the most hopeful truths I’ve found in this journey comes from Jay Adams’s book How to Help People Change. Adams was convinced that God never commands what He does not also empower us to do.

Addiction often whispers the lie: You can never change. You will always be this way. But the gospel says the opposite: in Christ, change is not only possible—it is promised.

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” (2 Corinthians 5:17, ESV)

This doesn’t mean change is instant or easy. Just as a coffee bean must be ground and pressed to release its aroma, we often feel the grinding pressure of sanctification (being set aside to be holy). But God is at work, shaping us into something beautiful.

Adams reminded me that real change begins with repentance and faith. It continues through obedience, one step at a time. God uses His Word, His Spirit, and His people to bring about lasting transformation.

As students step into senior year of high school—the final stretch before graduation—they face questions that can feel overwhelming: What do I do with my life after school? Similarly, adults moving from long-term work life into retirement, career changes, or unexpected seasons of disability wrestle with the same uncertainty: What now? Where do I belong? How do I move forward?

Though the circumstances differ, the emotions are strikingly similar. Anxiety, fear, excitement, and even frustration can make it tempting to retreat into mind-soothing habits or quick fixes—whether scrolling endlessly, seeking risky thrills, gambling, or turning to substances.

Like sand washing away around a pool during a storm, these seasons of change reveal weak spots in our foundations. They challenge us to ask: Are my habits, routines, and spiritual grounding strong enough to keep me steady?

Self-control, accountability, and godly habits become the anchors that hold us firm amid uncertainty.

Transitions bring storms, and storms heighten temptation. Teens face peer pressure, academics, and looming questions about the future. Adults often wrestle with identity, fear of irrelevance, or feelings of loss.

In both cases, the temptation is to seek instant relief. False solutions whisper: Escape here. This will make you feel better. But they rarely deliver. Instead, they create cycles of secrecy, shame, and dependency.

Some common false solutions include:

• Substance use – alcohol, drugs, or other chemical highs.
• Gambling or thrill-seeking – trying to feel alive or distracted.
• Screen addiction – endless scrolling, social media, or gaming.
• Avoiding responsibility – ignoring the natural consequences of choices.

Proverbs 13:20 warns us:

“Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.” (ESV)

We need guidance, community, and mentorship to resist these false anchors and pursue lasting stability.

Resilience doesn’t come from avoiding discomfort—it’s built through guidance, discipline, and practice. Both teens and adults benefit from:

1. Clear expectations – knowing right from wrong and the consequences of choices.
2. Opportunities for responsibility – tasks at home, volunteering, mentoring, or personal projects.
3. Self-regulation skills – learning to pause, reflect, and choose wisely instead of reacting impulsively.
4. Spiritual grounding – prayer, Scripture, and reliance on God’s wisdom.
5. Community and accountability – mentors, trusted friends, or small groups that encourage godly decision-making.

The Bible points us back to trust:

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.” (Proverbs 3:5–6, ESV)

Every time a teen or adult chooses God’s way instead of a quick fix, they are placing a stone in the foundation of their character.

James 1:2–4 gives us the bigger picture:

“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” (ESV)

Storms, struggles, and seasons of transition aren’t wasted—they produce steadfastness, shaping us into people who stand firm in faith.

Practical Steps for Navigating Change

• Engage openly – talk about fears, pressures, and temptations without judgment.
• Model self-control – demonstrate godly ways of handling stress and uncertainty.
• Encourage honest reflection – identify false solutions and pursue healthier alternatives.
• Provide safe challenges – let both teens and adults face risks and natural consequences.
• Celebrate growth – affirm wise choices and godly responses, reinforcing the value of patience and perseverance.

Life transitions are inevitable, whether it’s a teen facing graduation or an adult entering a new life season. The storms will come. But with godly habits, accountability, and reliance on Christ, both teens and adults can navigate uncertainty with wisdom, strength, and hope.

True stability and peace don’t come from quick fixes—they come from standing firm on the foundation of God’s t

The Gift of Self-Control: Standing Firm When the Storms Come

 

 As I continued to contemplate the sand being washed away around our pool, I found myself thinking about how easy it is to fall into a victim mentality. It would be so tempting to give up—walk away from the piles of paperwork, doctor visit reports, upcoming appointments, and the discipline required for daily routines. The temptation to retreat into mind-soothing activities, to numb the discomfort, is strong. Yet, God calls us to stand firm, even when the storm makes everything feel fragile.

Self-control is one of the firm foundations that keeps us steady in these moments. It’s a gift from God, a protective barrier that shields us from being swept away by temptation, addictive impulses, or the easy lure of instant relief.

Without self-control, pleasure becomes a tyrant. Gambling, excessive use of social media, alcohol, pornography, or other dopamine-driven behaviors promise short-term relief but often leave us trapped in cycles of shame, secrecy, and addiction.

The Apostle Paul warns in 1 Corinthians 6:12 (ESV):

“All things are lawful for me,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful for me,” but I will not be enslaved by anything.”

Self-control allows us to enjoy life without being enslaved by it. It gives us the freedom to navigate life’s storms without being tossed by every impulse or fleeting desire.

Ed Welch, in his book Blame It on the Brain, reminds us that while our biology and brain chemistry are real factors in addiction, they are not the whole story. The brain may be the stage where these struggles play out, but the heart is the actor.

This is where balance is so important. Sometimes people need medical care—withdrawal support, treatment for chemical imbalances, or guidance from a wise doctor. God gave us bodies, and caring for them matters. But medical treatment alone cannot change the heart. True self-control is not just willpower or biology; it is the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22–23).

That means even when the storm inside us feels chemical, physical, or overwhelming, God’s Spirit gives us hope and a way forward.

It’s easy to fall into the victim narrative: “I can’t help it; my trauma made me this way,” or “I was born with a temperament to addiction.” These realities may be true, but Scripture never lets us stop there. God calls us to responsibility, to a deliberate choice to walk in freedom:

“For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” (2 Timothy 1:7, ESV)

Self-control is not merely about restraint; it is a fruit of the Spirit that grows as we surrender to God. The same storms that expose weaknesses can also cultivate resilience, character, and hope when we respond in obedience.

Self-control begins in childhood, but our culture often looks for quick fixes—either by medicating children or by excusing their behavior, allowing them to act out without consequences. Both approaches fail to teach true self-regulation.

Children need age-appropriate expectations, clear boundaries, and guidance in managing impulses. Excusing unwanted behavior, ignoring it, or constantly cushioning them from discomfort produces adults who struggle with responsibility, self-control, and the natural consequences of choices.

Proverbs 22:6 (ESV) reminds us:

“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

By holding children accountable in loving ways, we teach them resilience, patience, and the ability to make godly choices—a foundation that will help them navigate life’s storms with strength.

Shame can destroy self-control. When we feel unworthy or fear rejection, we hide our struggles, perpetuating cycles of addiction, pleasure-seeking, or unhealthy habits. But God calls us out of secrecy into community and accountability:

“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” (James 5:16, ESV)

Honesty with God and with trusted people allows shame to lose its grip. Community becomes the space where our self-control is strengthened, where God’s grace is tangible, and where healing begins.

 

Practical Steps to Grow Self-Control

1. Start small – choose one habit or behavior to focus on at a time. Daily consistency is more powerful than occasional intensity.
2. Pray for strength – self-control is a gift from the Spirit. Ask Him daily to guide your choices.
3. Seek accountability – share your struggles with trusted people who will pray, encourage, and hold you accountable.
4. Replace idols with God-centered habits – avoid swapping one pleasure-seeking behavior for another. Engage in worship, service, or Scripture instead.
5. Celebrate small victories – each choice to honor God strengthens your foundation for the storms ahead.

 

Self-control is not a restriction; it is freedom. It is the rock that steadies us when storms come. It is the gift of God that allows us to live in peace, not in slavery to fleeting pleasures. By embracing this gift—for ourselves and for the children we guide—we can navigate life’s storms with wisdom, stability, and hope.

Foundations of Godly Habits: Building on Rock, Not Sand

 

Last night, as the storm rolled in, I sat watching the sand around our pool wash away. The rain pounded hard, and the soil shifted little by little. What once looked firm and secure now appeared fragile, and I couldn’t help but wonder if the foundation might give way.

It made me think about life. We all go through storms—sometimes they come as sudden downpours, other times as long, exhausting seasons that seem to erode us little by little. If our lives are not built on a strong foundation, if our habits are not healthy and stable, the storm will quickly expose the weakness of our footing.

Healthy habits are like the firm ground that holds us steady when storms come. Without them, it’s easy to slip into unhealthy cycles: grabbing at quick fixes, self-medicating with substances, or turning to destructive behaviors to cope. But with a strong foundation—rooted in God’s truth and practical self-discipline—we can withstand the storm without being washed away.

Bad habits never announce themselves with chains. They creep in slowly, often guarded by excuses:

• “It’s not hurting anyone.”
• “I can stop whenever I want.”
• “I’ve done this for thirty years—it would take the next thirty to change.”
• “At least it’s better than what others are doing.”

But like the storm that washed away the sand around my pool, these excuses slowly erode stability. They leave us fragile, unable to stand when life’s pressures rise.

Our culture loves shortcuts. A pill promises instant focus. A new diet promises fast results. Gambling promises a rush of excitement. Social media offers fleeting validation. Pornography and sexual indulgence promise relief from loneliness or stress.

But none of these fix the foundation. At best, they swap one behavior for another. At worst, they enslave us further.

This is why Jay Adams, in How to Help People Change, reminds us that real transformation is not surface-level behavior modification—it’s a change of the heart. His biblical framework is clear:

1. Put Off – Name the addiction honestly. Repent and turn away from it.
2. Renew the Mind – Let God’s truth reshape how we see ourselves, our desires, and our habits.
3. Put On – Replace destructive patterns with godly ones—habits rooted in obedience and trust.

Romans 12:2 calls us to this kind of transformation:

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Self-control isn’t simply “gritting our teeth until we succeed.” Scripture says it is a fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22–23). That means it grows as we surrender to God daily. When we resist destructive cravings, we’re not just saying no—we’re saying yes to something better: peace, freedom, and alignment with God’s will.

But this is not merely a spiritual issue in isolation. Sometimes the body has been affected—imbalances, trauma, or chemical damage may need to be addressed with the help of doctors. Medical care can support the process, but only Christ renews the heart. True healing brings both body and soul under His care.

These truths matter in our homes and schools too. Too often, children showing normal immaturity or restlessness are quickly medicated to make classrooms “manageable.” But a medicated classroom does not produce young adults who can regulate themselves.

Proverbs 22:6 reminds us:

“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Children need loving discipline, clear expectations, and training in self-control. Excusing or glossing over harmful behaviors—or masking them with medication—does not lay a foundation. It builds on shifting sand.

One of the strongest chains of bad habits aka addiction is shame. It whispers: “You’ll be rejected if anyone finds out. Hide it. Handle it alone.” Past experiences of rejection or being told to “keep it secret” can push people deeper into isolation.

But secrecy feeds addiction. It leads to more guilt, more shame, and greater dependence on destructive habits. God’s Word offers the opposite:

“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)

Healing begins in honesty—with God and with trusted community. In the light, the cycle of shame breaks, and grace begins to rebuild what storms have eroded.

Storms will come. Stress, grief, loss, trauma, temptation—they’re unavoidable. But if we begin laying a foundation now, with habits anchored in God’s Word, we won’t collapse when the rain falls.

Jesus said:

“Everyone then who hears these words of mine and does them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.” (Matthew 7:24–25)

Our habits are the daily bricks of that foundation—small choices surrendered to God. They may seem insignificant in calm weather, but when the storm rages, they are the difference between standing firm and being washed away.

When Light Isn't Light: Discernment in a Spiritually Blended World

Would you sense it if your child was being gently introduced to sorcery—wrapped in glitter, good vibes, and family fun? In today’s society, spiritual darkness doesn’t march in wearing horns—it glides in under the banners of wellness, empowerment, healing, and enlightenment. Events that sound like wholesome family entertainment often serve as open doors to deceptive spiritual influences.

This is not about the simple, wholesome use of herbs for easing ailments, or growing garden produce to nourish our bodies. God has given us His creation for our well-being. But what we are speaking of here carries far greater spiritual undertones. These practices are increasingly tied to belief systems and rituals rooted in mysticism, energy manipulation, and New Age philosophy that are contrary to God’s truth.

Let’s take a deeper look at a common modern-day invitation:

“Come join us for a summer solstice fair. Shop for items crafted by our area's most talented artisans offering handmade jewelry, skin care products, soaps, artwork, books, and more. Explore alternative health care options with one of our versatile energy workers. Sit down with one of our insightful readers, experienced in tarot, oracle, astrology, and more.”

It sounds innocent—creative, inclusive, fun for the whole family. But this is precisely how deception works: by cloaking the spiritually dangerous in a language of positivity, beauty, and health.

Behind artisan booths and glittering crystals lies a dangerous rebranding of ancient spiritual practices that Scripture identifies as offensive to God. What we once taught our children to avoid is now presented in curated booths with pastel signage, soft music, and free samples.

2 Corinthians 11:14-15 (ESV): “And no wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light. So it is no surprise if his servants, also, disguise themselves as servants of righteousness. Their end will correspond to their deeds.”

What used to be whispered in secrecy is now proudly posted in community event pages, shared on social media, and hosted in parks and fairgrounds. These gatherings often include words like:

• “Energy alignment”

• “Chakra healing”

• “Spiritual awakening”

• “Higher self guidance”

• “Sacred feminine”

These aren’t just creative expressions—they are spiritual claims that open the door to beliefs, rituals, and powers not aligned with the Holy Spirit.

Deuteronomy 18:10-12 (ESV): “There shall not be found among you anyone who burns his son or his daughter as an offering, anyone who practices divination or tells fortunes or interprets omens, or a sorcerer or a charmer or a medium or a necromancer...for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord.”

Many modern spiritual fairs make a pointed effort to appear family-friendly. They advertise “kids’ crystal workshops,” art tents, drum circles, and petting zoos. But while children may be coloring dreamcatchers or planting ‘wish gardens,’ they’re also being slowly exposed to practices that spiritually condition them to accept New Age worldviews.

It’s not just about crafts and community—it’s about normalizing spiritual concepts that conflict with biblical truth.

Ephesians 5:6 (ESV): “Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience.”

Proverbs 22:6 (ESV): “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

As parents, grandparents, mentors, and believers, we must ask: Are we protecting our families not just from what is evil—but also from what merely appears good but is spiritually harmful?

Marketing for these events is deeply intentional. It doesn’t mention witchcraft or the occult—it speaks instead of “healing,” “wholeness,” and “alignment.”

Words to watch for:

• “Awakening”

• “Sacred journey”

• “Universal energy”

• “Reiki”

• “Spirit guides”

• “Moon magic”

These terms have become so normalized that many don’t question them. But they are rooted in spiritual systems that directly oppose God’s authority and truth.

Colossians 2:8 (ESV): “See to it that no one takes you captive by philosophy and empty deceit, according to human tradition, according to the elemental spirits of the world, and not according to Christ.”

How to Guard Your Heart and Home

1. Pray for spiritual discernment. Ask the Holy Spirit to sharpen your awareness.

2. Examine invitations. Read event descriptions carefully. Look beyond the surface.

3. Teach children biblical truth. Equip them to discern between light and darkness.

4. Speak up in love. Gently help others recognize deception. You may be the only warning they hear.

1 Peter 5:8 (ESV): “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”

Ephesians 4:15 (ESV): “Speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ.”

You don’t need to be afraid, but you do need to be alert. Satan rarely shows up as a monster—he often shows up as a mentor, healer, or entertainer. But the Word of God equips us to see through illusions.

Romans 13:12 (ESV): “The night is far gone; the day is at hand. So then let us cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light.”

Let’s stay rooted in Scripture, walking in truth, and training the next generation to recognize deception—not because we’re fearful, but because we’re faithful.

John 8:31-32 (ESV): “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

When the Words Sting: Healing from the Hurt of Slander

Have you ever poured hot water on an ant hill, thinking you’d wiped it out—only to find new hills forming days later? We tried it once. The steam rose, and we thought we’d finally stopped the invasion. But some of those ants escaped. And not long after, they were back—building again, this time even closer to our home.

Slander is a lot like that.

Someone says something false about you—twists a story, speaks out of anger, or spreads lies in an attempt to hurt or control a situation. It might come from jealousy, revenge, or just a careless heart. And the damage doesn’t stay contained. It spreads—quietly, persistently—just like those ants.

It’s heartbreaking when someone paints you falsely, and others believe them. The sting is sharp, but deeper still is the ache when the person doing the damage is someone you trusted. A friend. A family member. Someone who once walked with you—perhaps even a fellow believer.

Jesus understood this deeply. In Mark 7:20–23 (ESV), He tells us:

“What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts… slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person.”

God didn’t leave us without guidance when it comes to dealing with conflict inside His body. When someone is gossiping or spreading untruths, Scripture gives a clear, grace-filled path to follow.

Jesus taught in Matthew 18:15–17 that if someone sins against you, you should go to them privately first:

• Step One: Go directly to the person. Don’t vent to others—speak with them in love and humility.
• Step Two: If they won’t listen, take a mature believer with you as a witness and try again.
• Step Three: If they still refuse to change, Scripture calls us to step back, entrusting the matter to God.

This pattern isn’t about revenge—it’s about restoration and protecting the body of Christ from division. If the gossip continues even after you've followed these steps, you forgive—but you don’t have to stay close. You guard your peace by creating space, not out of bitterness but out of wisdom.

“If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.”
—Romans 12:18 (ESV)

Gossip Has Consequences—God Takes It Seriously Scripture speaks clearly and repeatedly about the damage caused by gossip and slander:

• Proverbs 16:28 (ESV): “A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends.”
• Proverbs 20:19 (ESV): “Whoever goes about slandering reveals secrets; therefore do not associate with a simple babbler.”
• Ephesians 4:29 (ESV): “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up…”
• Leviticus 19:16 (ESV): “You shall not go around as a slanderer among your people…”
• Psalm 34:13 (ESV): “Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking deceit.”
• 2 Corinthians 12:20 (ESV): “…that perhaps there may be quarreling, jealousy, anger, hostility, slander, gossip…”
• James 1:26 (ESV): “If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue… this person's religion is worthless.”
• Romans 1:29 (ESV): “They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness… full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips.”
• Matthew 12:36 (ESV): “I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak.”

Gossip isn’t small in God’s eyes. It’s not harmless. It wrecks reputations, divides relationships, and dishonors the gospel.

Sometimes, even after doing everything right, the person doesn’t acknowledge their sin. They may even continue the behavior. That’s when you set up a healthy boundary—not as a punishment, but as protection. Stepping away allows space for healing and gives your heart room to process and release.

“Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.”
—Proverbs 4:23 (ESV)

Forgiveness does not mean pretending it didn’t hurt. It means you choose not to carry the weight of resentment. You don’t allow the offense to take up real estate in your heart or your mind.

In your pain, you are not alone. God is not distant from your wounds—He’s present, near, and deeply caring.

“Trust in him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before him; God is a refuge for us.”
—Psalm 62:8 (ESV)

Bring your pain to Him. Let Him be your defender.

“Having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame.”
—1 Peter 3:16 (ESV)

“For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes…”
—Romans 1:16 (ESV)

“For the word of the cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.”
—1 Corinthians 1:18 (ESV)

You may not always get to defend your name—but God can. And He will.

So what do we do when the sting of slander still lingers?

• We follow Jesus’ steps for reconciliation.
• We speak the truth in love, but we don’t let their words define us.
• We set boundaries to guard our hearts and maintain peace.
• We forgive, because we have been forgiven.
• We stand firm, because God's power is still working in our lives.

Even if some of the “ants” got away… even if the damage seems beyond repair… God is still working. He is still restoring. And He is still writing beauty into the broken places.